Cat Carrier

Seth sent me a great new product that's just hit the market - a new and improved cat carrier.

If you've ever tried to take your cat to the vet for shots, etc., you'll know what a pain in the rear it can be. This little gadget would solve all those problems.

Doncha think?

Forgot

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. The cat's name is Star.

The Cat

Janae reminded me that I hadn’t written anything about the last member of our family. I’m repenting of that error and will try to write something fitting of this member of our family.

I’m the cat. Don’t bother me. I only do what I want, when I want. I will disappear when you want me. I’ll be around when you don’t want me. While most cats will meow at the door when they want out, I think it’s more fitting to go into the living room and scratch the couch. That’s a sure sign I want to be let out.

I don’t like the kind, wonderful man of the house. He stepped on my head when I was little and I haven’t forgiven him. Of course it wasn’t my fault. I was taking a nap on the stairs leading from the kitchen to the garage. I can’t help it if it was dark in the garage and that he was carrying something in his arms so he couldn’t see me. He should have known that all space is my space and take care to look where he walks.

So now I get back at him. I sit in his chair and won’t move. I lie on his side of the bed. I do whatever I can to annoy him. I also annoy him because he likes the dog more than me. I just don’t understand it.

Of course I love the lady of the house. She pets me, gives me treats and treats me like the king that I am. (Boy do I have her fooled!!)

I think I do contribute around here. I keep the mouse, bat and giant moth population down. If I’m feeling particularly generous, I leave an offering of one of these things on the garage steps. I’ve been known to stalk and kill poor, defenseless birds, but what do you expect, I’m a cat.

So there you have it, a tribute to the last member of our household. The cat.

Cruel Irony

When I was on active duty in the Navy I was assigned as co-counsel representing one of two sailors accused of stealing things out of the mail system. They were postal clerks stationed in Iceland. Of course it required traveling to Iceland on two occasions; one to conduct discovery and the second time for the trial.

Iceland doesn’t or didn’t have a big PX nor a lot of opportunities to buy things on the local economy so most people ordered things from catalogues. (This was pre-e-bay in case you were wondering.) Anyway, these two postal clerks would pick up the mail from the plane and while they drove it back to the post office, one of them would be in the back of the truck going through things and taking what they wanted; shoes, gym clothes, watches, anything of value.

As you can imagine, this created quite a lot of frustration on the part of the military members whose things were stolen. They had to go through the hassle of contacting the company that sent the item, filing a claim with them and with the post office and sometimes never getting the things they ordered. It was quite a morale dampener for the people that live on base.

How they got caught was pretty simple. One of the girls gave her boyfriend the Chicago Bulls jersey and expensive Nike shoes that she had stolen. The victim saw the boyfriend wearing them at the gym and asked where he got them. When he said that he received them as a gift from his girlfriend, the victim put two and two together and reported it to base police. It was all down hill from there.

Of course I felt bad for the victims but I had a job to do in defending one of these girls. I wasn’t successful, she got convicted, but I did my best to defend her.

Well jump ahead 12 years. Now I’m the victim of mail theft and I am or was, mad as HELL!!!

On bazaar day, we have a tailor that brings bolts of cloth and will tailor make suits, overcoats, womens’ clothes, tuxedos, dress uniforms, just about anything you’d want made he can make. And the prices are incredible.

Well over the course of the last four months I had him make 5 suits with two pair of pants as well as 4 additional pair of slacks. I mailed them home right after Christmas. Thankfully I insured the box but failed to list specifically on the customs form what was in the box. All I said was “clothes,” Christmas decorations and a few other things.

I won’t give you all the details of this incident, but when the box arrived home Janae e-mailed me asking if there weren’t supposed to be suits in the box. I thought, “what a silly question. Of course there are suits in the box – five coats and 14 pair of pants”

Yep, you guessed it. Someone at customs opened my box and stole all my suit coats and all but three pair of pants. I can’t tell you how angry I was. It’s been several days now so I’ve calmed down and am taking steps to help Janae file a claim with the post office but there’s no guarantee they’ll honor my claim. They may say that since all I listed on the form was clothes and clothes were delivered they won’t honor the claim. I’m hoping that by getting statements from the postal clerk who examined the box and saw that it was full of clothes, getting receipts from the tailor and a statement from me that the post office will be persuaded that I’m not trying to commit fraud. If they don’t, well then I’ve learned a very expensive lesson. After Janae files the claim, I should know in 8-10 weeks after that. Wish me luck!!

Janae said that the clerk at the post office told her that you have to be very specific when you fill out the customs form. If you just list general things like I did, without being specific, it can be an invitation for a dishonest customs agent to open the box and go shopping. Much like what the girls in Iceland did. The girls that I defended.

Anyway it just seemed like a cruel turn of events that I would defend criminals who stole things out of the mail and now I’m the victim.

Who Am I?

Luke wanted to know who the villians were that came with Superman, WonderWoman and Batman. I told him I didn't remember their names as I didn't keep the box they came in. He asked me to post a picture of them here so he could try and identify them.

Anyone know the names of these villians?

Obviously one of them is an evil Superman but I have no idea what his evil name was.

Anyway Luke, here they are...

Oh and for whoever has commented about the clothing of WonderWoman (or lack thereof) I can only say that I didn't chose her costume but boy she looks just as good in it as I rememeber from when I was 14.

FOB Puppies

There's a pack of dogs that live near the ANA 2nd Brigade headquarters. One of the females recently had a litter. The puppies are absolutely adorable. Wish I had a puppy!!! Wish my puppy were still a puppy but I love him the way he is.

Fairbourn covered the shelter they had with a piece of tin. When it snowed before Christmas I'm sure they appreciated the added protection.

Since these dogs are not spayed or neutered, I imagine we'll be seeing another litter of pups here shortly.

Super Hero Humanitarian Visit!!

Wonder Woman decided she needed to accompany me on our humanitarian visit yesterday. Superman, the ever chivilrous Super Hero that he is decided that he needed to come with us to offer support and protection.

Here they are getting ready to get into the humvee.



Before the buckled themselves in, they made sure our gunner up top was prepared for battle. They found him sufficiently armed and protected. Only then did they consent to get inside the vehicle with me.













Here we are at the second location. Since it was a little more hectic, they stayed close by me until they ascertained that the situation was safe. After all was secured, they ventured out on their own to dispense supplies.











After we were finished passing out supplies and were cleaning up, they stood watch as we got loaded back into the humvees. We all felt much safer with them standing guard!!



Wonder Woman felt that Merrill had done such a great job that he deserved a kiss. From the expression on Merrill's face, I think he liked it.


(Me and Superman were just a little jealous!!)

Humanitarian Visit - January 13, 2006

NOTE: I may write a narrative of our visit later but for now, I'll let the pictures and descriptions speak for themselves.

We finally went on our humanitarian drop today.

Here's the front of our convoy lined up, ready to go.

We took several ANA soldiers with us. It was great as they passed out most of the items and kept the kids and adults under control.

We went to a girl's school first and passed out a few items.

This little girl was wearing the most beautiful dress. The picture doesn't do it justice. The yellow circles on the dress were actually shiny spangles. Her dress sparkled in the sun. I mistakenly thought she came from a family with money but Wais pointed out that she was wearing sandals with plastic bags over her feet. He said that families will purchase beautiful clothes for their kids for the holidays despite not having money for other things.

Here I am in the line passing out clothes from a box my Aunt Merleen Fox sent. Thanks Merleen!!

I also got several boxes of clothes and toys from Sheryl Anderson and her ward's primary. It's the same ward that my cousin Russell and Melissa Fox live in. Thanks to them! Another thanks to Paula Goodfellow, another one of my donors that I've never met, don't know personally but who took the time to assemble boxes of clothes to send. Thank you!!

This young man was holding his sister. I gave her a beanie baby sent by my Aunt. I then noticed her feet. What do you see on them? Frostbite? That was about all that there was. When I noticed that, Wais and I went looking for a pair of shoes for her. We found a pair that fit perfectly in a box Marintha Miles. I don't know Marintha and don't know how she found about our need, but thank you Marintha for sending 4 boxes full of shoes!! I know this little girl and her family thank you as well!!

Janae sent me some mini-soccer balls. Soccer is the favorite sport here so you can imagine what a hit they were with the boys.

After we passed out the items at the girl's school, we went to another location where hundreds of kids and their mothers were waiting.

It was here that I passed out several boxes of items donated to Luke's Eagle Scout project. These boxes had the school supplies. The clothes were in a different location. Thanks to all of you who donated towards Luke's project. I still have lots of boxes under my bed and more are coming every day. We'll get them distributed before too long and I'll post the pictures at that time.

Here I am passing out hygiene kits that came as part of Luke's Eagle project as well as beanie babies. Like most kids, they were more thrilled with the beanie babies than they were with the toothpaste, but in the long run, I hope the toothpaste ends up being of greater value to them.

Here's one of the interpreters helping me pass out the school supplies that Luke sent.

Merleen found some great blankets and sent them. Here's just one mother that was a recipient of her willingness to send things.

Merleen also sent lots of winter clothes. She made these really cool hats that also served as a scarf. Here's a picture of just one child I personally gave them to. The girls were so excited to receive them.

One of our secretaries at work, Cecilia Zambrano, knitted me some beanies. When I wore the black one I was told that it was not authorized. So, I put them to good use. I gave them to these brothers. I couldn't get them to look at the camera. (I'm not wearing my helmet as I had put on the black beanie for the previous picture - not shown here.)

Cecilia also sent me some silly string. There was a group of teenage boys hanging on the wall trying to get us to give them something. Wais and I gave them something - we squireted them with silly string. We then gave them the half-full cans. They loved it!!

Wais really enjoyed passing out the items and he was a huge help.

The group Soldier's Angles sent me several boxes of fleece blankets. They were a huge hit with the kids. Thanks to Joan Sandoval for sending the blankets.

I've been so impressed by the support that we have received from groups and individuals at home. I can't thank you enough for all you've done for us!!

Thanks everyone!!

The Afghan Adventures of Superman - Working out at the Gym

I haven't had a workout buddy for quite some time so Superman went to the gym with me today. We have to sign in so that the powers that be can keep track of how many people are using the equipment. I think they'll be honored that Superman stooped to using our lowly, humble gym.

Here he is loading the weights on the bench press. He wasn't through loading the plates when I took the picture and of course he put on several more plates and of course, this is just one side of the bar. I didn't think he was going to stop putting on the plates. I couldn't even imagine lifting that much weight in my wildest dreams.

He was benching so fast that it was a blur, hence the blurry picture. It was truly an awesome sight watching all that weight going up and down. The bar was actually bending in the middle!!!

After our upper body workout, we switched to lower body. Here he is on the leg press bench.

After an impressive workout in the weight room, we did some crunches using the swiss ball.

Because he never really got his heart rate up with the weights, he decided to try out the treadmill. Only because of the "high quality" of my camera was I able to catch this picture of him running. Otherwise it was just a blur.

What a workout!! I felt so invigorated and was grateful to my buddy for working out with me!!

The Afghan Adventures of Superman - Computer Supervisor

Here's Superman making sure that I'm getting my work done.

He's actually a great boss to work for. Sort of like Paul Johnson. (Can anyone say "suck-up?")

"Battle Wound" - Not Really!! I wasn't injured!!!

My sister Tiffany was telling me that her son, Will, was so proud of me being in the Army and being at "war." She said that he's fascinated with the military. I decided to send her a couple of pictures to show her kids some of the things I've been doing. Being the twisted uncle that I am, I sent this first picture. Well Will thought that I had been shot and was being treated for my wounds. I laughed but realized that a kindergarten aged little boy would have no clue as to the difference between training and real life.

So Will, your Uncle Bob was not shot. What these pictures show is me being the "patient" while another soldier practices administering an IV into my arm. I had to do the same thing to him. It was actually pretty cool. It's been so long since I did it but I hope that if the situation required I'd be able to remember.

Another Great Quote

On occasion I get really great quotes sent to me. Tonight I got another one. Janae sent it to me. It came in a card. The front of the card posed the question, “Is the glass half-empty…or half-full?” It showed a fish bowl with a cat sitting in it. Inside the card said, “Try to look on the bright side, and things will look up soon.” I thanked her for the card and said that the bright side would be having a full glass!! I’m sure I’ll hear it from all the cat lovers out there now but I chuckled at my own cleverness.

What was great about the card was the quote that she included. Janae had been reading a book about Africa by Alexander McCall Smith. She said that while the quote applied to Africa she thought it could equally apply to us here in Afghanistan. It does.

“There was so much suffering in Africa [Afghanistan] that it was tempting just to shrug your shoulders and walk away. But you can’t do that, she thought. You just can’t.”

We are faced with the same situation. Even though we are somewhat insulated when we remain here on base, once we leave the safety and comfort of Blackhorse, the suffering and poverty become so evident. I guess that’s why I’m so thankful for all of you who have been so generous with your donations either to Luke’s Eagle Scout project or who have simply sent items here.

As I said, Thursday is the day when I’ll be able to give away all the donations, other than the school supplies, that I have received thus far. I’m going on a medical mission and it’s estimated that we’ll see 600 patients, many of whom will be children. My camera arrived tonight – hooray!! So I’ll be sure to take a lot of pictures. Check back towards the end of the week and I’ll get them posted to my blog page. I’ll try to identify who sent what items in the pictures, but no promises.

My sister Tiffany is catching the spirit as well. She wants her kids to experience getting to know the Afghan children. She’s working on getting her son’s class, and hopefully school involved and doing a project to benefit the kids here. Hopefully she can inspire others to get involved as well.

Like the quote says, sometimes the temptation is to just shrug your shoulders and walk away. But, like the story of the starfish (remember that one, the little boy walking on the shore throwing in star fish and when asked why he was doing that when there were so many on the shore, said that he was making a difference in that starfish’s life, then threw it in – it’s one of BG Wilson’s favorite stories – maybe I’ll post it) when we help just one child, one family, we’re making a difference. Only here it’s so much more than just giving them a coat or a piece of candy or school supplies. I truly believe that we are influencing these children and their families, showing them that we, as Americans, are not the bad, evil people some would have us believe. If we can win the hearts of the children now, just think where this country will be in 15-20 years.

So once again, thank you to all who have helped. I don’t think you’ll ever really now just how much this will mean to these kids, these families and this country.

Kindness and Generosity

Over the last couple of months I have been amazed, thrilled, thankful and humbled at the response I’ve received for humanitarian aid. Some of you responded immediately and sent items that have unfortunately sat in my office waiting to go out – Thursday – I hope!! (I’ve been part of two previous humanitarian projects that got canceled at the last minute. Keep your fingers crossed that this one won’t fall through.)

My family has been wonderful. Luke did his Eagle Scout project of collecting school supplies, hygiene items, toys and clothes. Family and friends were incredibly generous with donations as well as cash. My parents, Janae’s parents, my brother Chris, one of my Dad’s cousins – Carl Smith, and my good friend Dave Scott all contributed large amounts of change. I’m sure I’m leaving out names and I’m sorry but know how grateful we are to you. My aunt Merleen Fox my cousin’s wife, Melissa Fox our neighbor Jaymie Jorgensen, and many others donated or sent several boxes of donations. It’s been wonderful.

I got connected with a group called Soldier’s Angels. They send out care packages, supplies and all kinds of cool things to soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan. They have been incredible. Right before Christmas I received a case of coffee/hot chocolate mugs that I got to pass out the day before Christmas. It was fun. They’ve also sent almost 100 fleece blankets that I’ll pass out to the kids. They’re sending boxes of hot chocolate as the chow hall never has any. I also found out they’re sending a box of donated jungle boots. Finally, I got a box of office supplies, magazines and candy for the soldiers. They’ve been great. I’ve been contacted by at least 5 different representatives from Soldier’s Angels and they’ve all committed to sending all kinds of things. Their biggest concern is that no soldier go unloved or unsupported.

Finally I want to thank Brian Regan’s manager or publicist as well as Brian himself. If you don’t know who the comedian Brian Regan is, he’s all the rage at home. Seth introduced us to him last year and we all love his comedy. He was in concert in Salt Lake this last weekend and Janae bought tickets for her and the boys for Christmas. They were so excited. Well I got the brilliant idea to contact him via his website. I sent his "people" an e-mail telling them that I was a soldier in Afghanistan, that it was Janae’s birthday, that the whole family, except for me would be at his concert, etc, etc, and could he say hello to them for me. Well his publicist did one better. She e-mailed me back and said that she would leave backstage passes at the box office so they could meet after the concert. I told Janae two days before the concert and she was so excited. She didn’t tell the boys until they got there and of course they were ecstatic. I called Janae on her cell phone 15 minutes before the concert started (told her to turn off her cell phone but glad that she hadn't yet) and I could hear the excitement in all their voices. The report was that the concert was incredible and meeting him after the show was even more so.

I guess what I’m trying to say is thank-you to all the people out there who love and support us. As I said, I’ve been so overwhelmed by the love and support that we’ve received from complete strangers as well as family. It has humbled me beyond description. I just hope that when I get home I can give the kind of support to our troops that I’ve received since being here. The pure love of Christ is alive and well.

Value of Life

How would you feel if you were stuck in an arranged marriage? Setting aside our cultural taboos, how would you feel about marrying your first cousin?

What is the life of a child worth? If your newborn dies during childbirth, is someone to blame or is it simply God’s will?

When a child gets run over in the street or a soldier gets killed in the service, what is their life worth?

Well let me tell you my experience with these issues.

Of course we’d hate to be stuck in an arranged marriage. Here it’s a way of life. Many young people grow up knowing they’re going to marry their first cousin. My interpreter from the KMTC, Asmatullah, you can see his picture in the “Random Pictures” post, a few posts back. He was engaged to marry his cousin but he had the fortitude to break it off last month. Of course the families were not happy but he was in love with another young lady. He was hoping that once he broke off his engagement his family might enter into a marriage contract with his girlfriend. Today he found out that his girlfriend’s family has betrothed her to her cousin. As he was telling me I could see the tears begin to well up in his eyes. I was helping him with the paperwork to get a Visa and made the insensitive comment that maybe he’d find a young lady in the states to marry – of course I had already told him several times how sorry I was that she was marrying someone else lest you think me a complete cretin. He looked at me and said that he would never find anyone else to love. I felt so bad for him.

Another terp here at Blackhorse was in love with a classmate and they wanted to get married. He was engaged to his cousin and didn’t have the willpower to go against his family’s wishes. He married his cousin. He still sees his former girlfriend at school and it causes him quite a bit of turmoil as he is still in love with her. She no longer talks to him; either out of spite or respect that he’s now married. I feel bad for him.

So what kind of a relationship does that create with your spouse? I haven’t had the nerve to ask this direct question of anyone, least of all Wais. As I listen to him and the other terps and even our ANA counterparts talk about their families, it’s always about their children. Now it may be a cultural thing not to talk about their families but I get the very distinct impression that some, most, all of these guys have a deeper, greater love for their children. It makes me sad to think of being in that kind of relationship but then I guess that in the States we have many couples in the same kind of relationship. I guess what makes me sad is that these relationships never start out with that love, that passion that unite us in the States.

One of the terps newborns died recently. His attitude was “Enshallah” meaning God’s will. That’s a huge thing for them here, God’s Will. If you’re late it is God’s will. If your baby dies, it’s God’s will, not the doctor’s fault, the lack of sanitary conditions, a sick baby, or anything else, just God’s will. Wais tells me that death in child birth is not that uncommon here and that many children die while still young. “Enshallah” must give a measure of comfort to grieving parents to believe that it was God’s will that the baby die and I can see how it would.

The cynical lawyer in me sees it as a great way to keep malpractice costs down. I didn’t really say that did ?

Children run loose all over the place. Is it any wonder they get hit and killed by vehicles? Even the adults pay no need to traffic and walk out in front of moving vehicles and get hit and killed. If that happens, the family simply negotiates with the person who hit the person and gets paid off and it’s not very much. A few thousand Afghani is all which might only be a couple hundred bucks. Life’s not worth much here.

If you’re an Afghan soldier and killed by a coalition member, your life is worth a little over two thousand dollars. And the victim’s families will be grateful.

Life has such a different meaning and value here. Parents love their kids but don’t do a lot about keeping them safe.

Halfway?!?!

On June 5, 2006 we were activated. Seven months later, January 5, 2007, we’re halfway through out 14 month deployment. Halfway that is, if we are home on or before August 5, 2007. We arrived in country on August 20th and if the Army suddenly insisted that we remain in-country for exactly 12 months we’ve got a few more weeks to go to reach the halfway point, but since that shouldn’t happen, after today we’re on the downhill slope to going home!!! It's about freakin' time!!!

I thought I’d be a little more excited by the news, by it greeted me with little fanfare. In fact, someone else had to tell me as I would have never registered that fact.

In looking back over the last 7 months it’s all a blur. Shelby is only a bad memory, almost like a nightmare that you vaguely remember in the morning but can’t quite shake. I shudder at the thought that we have to go back before we get to go home but again, in the Army’s infinite wisdom we need to report back to Shelby to make sure our teeth are clean, our paperwork is in order, that we’re not going to go postal, etc, only to do it all again once we get home to Utah.

Now looking forward to our last 7 months here I can see where we need to go and what we need to do. The ANA have made tremendous progress in their military justice but so much more needs to be done. Yesterday we met with one of the legal officers of one of the brigades. I hadn’t made the time to actually go to his office before but am so glad that we finally did. He was so excited to have us there.

He told us of all the things he’s been doing to implement the new code. He showed me the binders he’s created that track all the disciplinary actions that the brigade takes. He told me that his brigade is conducting NJP. I figured it was the old style NJP where the commanders simply administered punishment without having a hearing. When I asked how they were doing it, he said they were following the new regulations and that he had provided them all with paperwork that was already filled out so they had samples. I was completely blown away. As we talked about all the things he’s been doing, I realized that this was a model legal officer that I needed to parade to the other brigades so they could see how a good legal department should be run. We’re going back tomorrow and I’m hoping to enlist him to help train the two other brigade legal officers on how to do what he’s been doing. This visit came at the perfect time as it’s reenergized me and helped me to focus on what we need to accomplish for our remaining time here.

So as we begin our “descent” my one hope is that I can accomplish everything that I want and need to get done.

Technology

Have you ever stopped to think how dependent you are, we are, on technology? Can you go one day without an e-mail? Can you perform your job effectively without the internet? I can’t.

Right before Christmas our network underwent an overhaul. It was only supposed to take two days but turned into six. For a week we didn’t have computer access. Our phone lines were also down. What that meant was that on Christmas, we had no phone lines, no internet access. It was pretty painful.

Since then, we’ve had continuing problems with our connectivity. Some days we have internet connection in our offices, other days we don’t. When we have no connectivity in our offices, we might be lucky and have it on the MWR (morale, welfare and recreation) computers. Sometimes not.

When the phones did come back up, it was on one single MWR phone. Then they all came up but the connections were bad. I’ve had more dropped calls the last two weeks than I did the first four months being here. It’s really frustrating. Janae and I have taken to saying “I love you” right up front (actually, there’s nothing wrong with that and maybe that should be the standard) rather than waiting until the end of the phone call as we’ve been disconnected several times.

But you know what, I’m not complaining. I know it sounds like it but I’m really not. I can’t believe how lucky I am to live where I do under the conditions that I have. Is it an inconvenience not being able to send e-mails to my counterparts here in-country? Of course. Is it a pain not being able to communicate with my family on a daily basis? Absolutely. But you know what, the fact that when conditions are optimal I can instantly send a message to my wife is amazing. I can’t imagine having to wait months for a single letter like our forefathers had to do in past wars. As soon as my personal computer gets here, we’ll be able to see each other and talk to each other even though we’re thousands and thousands of miles away. How cool is that?

The age of technology is truly amazing and a blessing.

Happy Birthday Janae!!

It’s time to celebrate my wonderful wife’s birthday. That means it’s today, January 4. When Janae and I got engaged, my Mother asked her when her birthday was. Before she really had a chance to answer, my Mother said that Janae could not be born in January since I and the next two brothers were all born in January; me on the 31st, Chris on the 8th and Matt on the 3rd. (April must have been a very good month for my parents! Ugh, you’re not supposed to think that about your parents – Gross!!) When my Mother learned that Janae’s birthday was also in January, she threw up her hands in despair, or something like that.

Well I’m glad she was born in January. Actually I would have been glad that she was born in any month because she has blessed my life immeasurably.

It’s a wonder we ever got married though. As many of you know, when we first met I thought she was a boring, book worm and she thought I was a rich, stuck-up snob. I’m not sure where she got the rich part from but the stuck-up snob part wasn’t too far off the mark. We both remember an incident that helped cement the “snob” part. I had just come from the testing center where I had failed miserably on an exam. I ran into her in the McKay building (is that right Honey?) and she asked me how I was doing. I was so bummed out over the exam that I basically brushed her off. How rude of me!!


(The picture - she's definitely not boring!)




Added to my disinterest in her was the fact that Jason, her brother, and his friends would sit in my Gospel Doctrine class and play “devil’s advocate” which drove me crazy. Well of course she was guilty just by association. Oh, and the fact that she sat in my class holding hands with her boyfriend didn’t help. Why I don’t know as I had a girlfriend at the time.

Of course I thought she was a beautiful, talented young woman but her intellect and circle of friends, plus the fact that I had a girlfriend at Rick’s kept us apart that first year we met.

Well the Lord works in mysterious ways. While I was in Mexico on a study abroad program, the girl I had been dating got engaged and Janae had broken up with her boyfriend. That fall I remember sitting in Sacrament Meeting when she and her sister-in-law to be, Pauline, sang in church. I was entranced. Right then I decided that she wasn’t that bad and maybe I should ask her out.

Call me a coward, but it took all the courage I could muster just to call and ask her out. I figured that she would never say yes but being the rash young man that I was, I took a chance. I’ll be forever grateful that I did.

The saga of working out the details of our first date – the Homecoming Dance – is a story in and of itself but suffice it to say, we had a great time. The dance was at the Capital building. I remember as we approached the steps of the Capital, Janae looked at me and said, “I’ll race you to the top.” I’ve been chasing her ever since. As we ran up the steps, I thought to myself, “this girl is not boring after all.”

We had a great time at the dance. I don’t remember much of the details, I just remember that I had a wonderful time with her.

As we were driving away from the Capital, I remember making small talk with my roommate and his date who were in the backseat. As we drove past the Salt Lake Temple, I made the passing comment that that’s where I wanted to get married. At that very moment I had the very real impression that I could marry this girl sitting next to me.

And that, as they say, was all she wrote. The dance was on October 16th, or thereabouts and we were engaged on New Years Eve. Again, how we got engaged is another story for another time.

I couldn’t believe it then and I still can’t believe it now that I was marrying Janae Durfee. She was smart, she was beautiful, she was talented. And she still is all those things. She was described to me before we even met as a “choice and fair companion.” How true are those words. I was then and I am still now, the luckiest man in the world.

Like all husbands, we have married far above our station in life. The thing that brings me the most fear is if I have somehow drug her down to my level as opposed to her lifting me up to hers. I sometimes wonder if we husbands don’t tend to do that. Shame on us!!

Prior to being deployed, Janae had several people say to her, “how are you going to handle Bob being gone?” Well one wise woman said to her, “You’re the one woman I know who will be able to handle this.” Janae was so grateful for that comment and that has proven so true. Janae is one of those women who, when faced with a challenge, doesn’t bemoan her fate or lot in life, but is one who tackles it head on. Of course it has been hard not having a husband at home, but she has risen to the challenge and excelled.

Janae is a gifted teacher. I could tell you about how in her third year of teaching she was voted “Teacher of the Year” for the district or how she was voted “Teacher of the Year” again a couple of years ago, as a substitute teacher no less, but I think that says it all. There have been many times when we’ve been out somewhere and a child will come up to her to say “hello.” The fact that several of her students from when she first taught, who are now married and have kids of their own, would still keep in touch with her is a testament to her talents.

But that’s not where her true teaching talent lies. It lies in the way she has raised our sons. I know, I know, your children are the best but you are all sadly mistaken. We have been blessed with incredible young men. That’s not to say that they don’t have their challenges, but they are great young men. What makes me so grateful though is that Janae was blessed with the talents necessary to bring forth that greatness. Some of you may be shaking your heads at that comment, but as I’ve watched her over the years teach and train our boys, I’ve been truly amazed. I hope someday our boys will come to realize just how lucky they are to have Janae as their mother.

And then there’s her musical talents. She can play any piece on the piano. Not that Handel’s Hallelujah Chorus is the most difficult piece to play, but Janae has it mastered, or at least will once again have it mastered given a few minutes time. I still remember with great pride moving to Virginia and her stepping in and playing for the Stake Choir with very little notice or practice time. I know Lani was grateful to have her move into the ward and stake. I love to hear her play but over the years I’ve failed to let her know that. When I get home I’ll rectify that mistake and make her play while I sit and listen.

Or maybe we’ll sit at the piano and sing together. That’s what captured my heart in the first place was listening to her sing. We used to sing together but again, one of the casualties of busy schedules and hectic lives. That’s one of the positive things about this deployment though, it’s made me realize all the wonderful things in my life that I allowed to slip by the wayside.

And then there’s her literary talents. She’s always been a good writer but since I’ve been gone, she’s really excelled. Not only does she write me just about every day, but what she writes has thrilled and amazed me at her creativity. She’s very gifted!

I guess what I’m trying to say, is that she is the most wonderful blessing, most wonderful person in my life. All too often I take her for granted and that’s probably my greatest sin. Again, one of the benefits of a deployment is the opportunity to recognize mistakes and try to rectify them. She lifts me up when I’m down, she encourages me, she loves me, sometimes when I may not be deserving of that love. But that’s what makes her great.

She is truly a choice daughter of our Heavenly Father and I am the luckiest man in the world to be married to her.

So Janae, on your birthday, I love you and miss you and can’t wait to get home so that I can try to make you remember why you married this not-so-rich, stuck-up snob.




This is my favorite picuture of the two of us - when we were much younger!!

Here's Janae and the boys. She's wearing the Princess Tiara I bought her at Disneyland this last year when we were there. Her Dad called her Princess when she was little so much so, that she thought her name was Janae Princess Durfee.

Random Photos

Here I am at the shooting range with my trusty 9mm.

Here's our LDS group meeting in our B-Hut.

This is Asmatullah, my interperter at the KMTC. He's a great young man.

Here I am in JBAD standing on top my my humvee. Aren't I an impressive sight?